me according to eharmony

This section of your profile describes your interactions with other people. The ways we communicate our feelings, beliefs and ideas to others are influenced by our cultural backgrounds, the way we were raised, and sometimes which side of the bed we got up on this morning. Some of us are very mindful of others making decisions we hope will be in their best interests, even if it means sometimes neglecting our own interests. Others of us believe each person should be responsible for themselves, taking deep pride in our own character and independence with a firm belief that others are best served by doing the same. The following describes how you engage with others; illustrating the dimension of your personality that determines your independence or your desire to reach out and touch others in meaningful ways.

Introduction to Agreeableness
This section of your profile describes your interactions with other people. The ways we communicate our feelings, beliefs and ideas to others are influenced by our cultural backgrounds, the way we were raised, and sometimes which side of the bed we got up on this morning. Some of us are very mindful of others making decisions we hope will be in their best interests, even if it means sometimes neglecting our own interests. Others of us believe each person should be responsible for themselves, taking deep pride in our own character and independence with a firm belief that others are best served by doing the same. The following describes how you engage with others; illustrating the dimension of your personality that determines your independence or your desire to reach out and touch others in meaningful ways.

You are best described as:
CONSISTENTLY TAKING CARE OF OTHERS

Words that describe you:
• Sympathetic
• Trusting
• Altruistic
• Selfless
• Tenderhearted
• Compassionate
• Straightforward
• Deferential
• Generous

A General Description of How You Interact with Others
"What can I do for you?" These words probably feel very natural to you. More than most people, you are genuinely interested in the well-being of others. If they are in trouble, you offer compassion and go out of your way to be helpful. If they need someone who will listen, you are attentive, trustworthy and sympathetic. And you are direct with them; when they need advice or counsel, you offer it in as straightforward and direct a manner as you can.

There may even be times when you put others' needs in front of your own. And you do so without the expectation of some reward or recognition. Yours is a different kind of compassion; you are genuinely tenderhearted and take pleasure in helping others while expecting little or nothing in return. For you, it's not tit-for-tat, you truly want to do things for others that will better their lives. You mean it when you ask, "What can I do for you?"

Negative Reactions Others May Have Toward You
Though your motives arise from genuine compassion, some people might think of you as "a little too good to be true." They could suspect that your kindness is something you use to ingratiate yourself with others or to get them to like you. Others may suspect that your altruism is a mask for your own problems; you take care of others but never let others get to know you well enough to offer you their care. Some of this suspicion may be genuine; they just can't believe you're this kind. But it may also be triggered by envy; people see in you a tenderheartedness they don't find in themselves, and it makes them uncomfortable so they take it out on you with their suspicions.

Another critical response others may have may be something you want to take a serious look at. If you spend your time taking care of others, you may not have enough left to take very good care of yourself. If you're always asking, "What can I do for you?", you may not focus enough on your own needs. You're so busy taking care of others that you neglect yourself and empty your reserves of energy and good health. Like we said, give it consideration and if it doesn't fit move on.

Positive Responses Others May Have Toward You
For the most part, people will feel gifted to come across someone like you. For those you help, you will be light in the darkness, a hand up when they've fallen into a ditch. Your true graciousness and selflessness is rather rare these days and is often a breath of fresh air in this all too often dog-eat-dog world. Others will see in you the kindness that each of us seeks in life, both in our own characters and in our relationships with others. And you will become a model of that honest compassion; someone others may even look up to. Hopefully that feels okay to you.


Introduction to Openness
How firmly committed are you to the ideas and beliefs that govern your thinking and guide your behavior? Some people trust their current ideas and beliefs the way a climber trusts the mountain; whichever way they move, whether the climb is on a familiar trail or over new ground, there is something solid beneath them, something they count on.

For others, new ideas, new solutions to old problems, new beliefs that replace tired convictions are like welcome wind in their sails. They can hardly wait to tack in a new direction and ride a new idea through uncharted waters. If it's new, it's interesting, and they're ready to explore.

The following paragraphs describe your responses to new ways of thinking and believing. How do you handle new information? Are you more like the climber on a familiar mountain or a sailor with a tiller in hand and a fresh breeze to propel you? How you integrate and process new information about the world and about others is a core aspect of your personality.

On the Openness Dimension you are:
VERY CURIOUS

Words that describe you:
• Imaginative
• Creative
• Intellectual
• Adventurous
• Unconventional
• Artistic
• Progressive
• Daring
• Inspired

A General Description of How You Approach New Information and Experiences
You are a very creative and imaginative person who is especially open to new ideas or new ways of thinking about old problems. You love to approach a conventional idea or a traditional way of doing things by walking around to the other side and explore it from a novel perspective. What's new is what interests you. Like an artist looking for a new way to see, you focus your imagination on envisioning ideas, events or problems in completely original ways. You are intellectually progressive, which means you like to think and feel your way into unexplored landscapes where you let your sense of intellectual adventure romp freely.

Because you are so curious you can also be very teachable. You learn from personal and interpersonal experiences as well as from classrooms and textbooks. You crave new information, and toss and turn it in your vivid imagination. When you come across an idea from someone else or a thought in your own head that is particularly provocative or original, you light up. With wit and wisdom, Dr. Seuss describes you like this: "Think left and think right and think low and think high. Oh, the thinks you can think up if only you try!"

Negative Reactions Others May Have Toward Your Style of Thinking
Not everyone will be thrilled by your adventurous mind. Many people are content with the ideas that have served them and their culture well, and with visions they've grown accustomed to of what is and is not true. They're not lit up at the prospect of moving out of their comfort zone. Others are afraid of new ways of thinking and creative ways of solving problems because they are somewhat fragile in the sense that they have trouble maintaining serenity in their current worlds and don't want someone, like you, for instance, pushing out the edges of their intellectual and cultural cosmos. So don't be surprised if your unconventional ideas sometimes get you criticized, or if some people walk away from the explorations of new territories of the mind that you find so exhilarating.

Positive Responses Others May Have Toward You
Despite some negative responses to your style of thinking, many people will find your progressive thoughts and vivid imagination quite attractive. Some will find your openness to new ways of thinking and your willingness to explore what others shy away from a very compelling quality. Other creative souls will find in you a companion on the journey into the unknown, and will welcome the camaraderie. Conversations with them will be lively and innovative and will ignite your imagination, and theirs. Even some who are less curious than you will be impressed by your courage to think and believe what is for them unimaginable, and by your willingness to go on adventures of the mind that they would find dangerous or daunting. For these people you might become a mentor into the wilder side of thinking and believing, and nudge them toward the creative and progressive ideas that you find so interesting.


Introduction to Emotional Stability
We're born with the capacity to feel deeply, so it's as natural as breathing to experience a range of emotions. Fear and joy and sadness, anger and shame and disgust lie somewhere within each of us. Ah, but to what extent do we control these emotions, and to what extent do they control us? How you answer this question of how your emotions play out in your life has a great deal to do with your levels of personal satisfaction and with the character of your relationships with others. Do you manage your emotions well, keeping them in check with your thinking and your willpower, or are you someone who lets emotions have their way, giving in to the wild dance of feelings? The following paragraphs describe your emotional range in terms of being a person who is emotionally steady or someone who is responsive to whatever feelings swell up in you.

On Emotional Stability you are:
VERY RESPONSIVE

Words that describe you:
• Emotional
• Insightful
• Perceptive
• Sensitive
• Self-conscious

A General Description of Your Reactivity
Each one of us encounters some hard times; we get caught off guard, or feel a sudden swell of emotion, whether from fear, joy, anger or sadness. Life is just like this sometimes. You know that because you are an emotional person. Some people go to great lengths to keep their emotions under wraps, to keep a stiff upper lip, to not let others know what emotions they are feeling. But that is not you. You embrace all of life's emotions, both the joys and the turmoil that life brings our way.

When you're having fun with a group of friends you don't even try to contain your pleasure; you laugh hard and feel every moment of the conversation because of the joy that comes from the experience. You make very intense friendships; ones where all of the depth of emotions that you feel can be shared. Emotions are such an essential part of your everyday life. You may cry at intense movies or when watching a sad story on the evening news. You get angry, at others or at yourself, and you do not stifle it. Emotions drive your personality and your relationships - you simply are what you feel.

You experience both the highs and the lows more profoundly than most. And you usually relish the intensity of your emotions. For sure you enjoy the positive times. There are those times, though, when your feelings get the best of you and you wonder how you will manage the moment. But because you are so in tune with all of your emotions you will experience something very pleasant and will be able to engage with that positive feeling to again enjoy the wonderful intensity that life brings you.

Negative Reactions Others May Have Toward You
If we were to ask you what negative reactions may result from your approach to your emotions, it would likely be that some people find it hard to deal with your strong feelings. They might think of you as emotionally "over the top," and wish you would be more like those who are always emotionally composed and less prone to fully engage their emotions.

Positive Responses Others May Have Toward You
Despite any negative reactions others may have toward you, many people will be grateful for your strong emotions and your willingness to experience these emotions. They will appreciate the candor with which you express even your deepest feelings, feelings they themselves might want to express but may find difficult to share. Your openness will be an encouragement to them as well. Still others may find your intensity compelling; they feel emotionally flat, and you could be a burst of passion in their dull worlds, and an encouragement to them to "get with" their own feelings. Any or all of these people will be grateful for a friend who is so emotionally present.


Introduction to Conscientiousness
It's a work day, breakfast is over, and you're dressed and ready. So how will you approach the tasks at hand? Some people work best with a clear schedule, a set of priorities and a due date for every step in the process. Others are, shall we say, less regimented. They approach a task with as much imagination as organization, and with a willingness to bend and modify in order to exercise some urge of creativity.

How about you? Do you walk in a straight line toward a clear goal, or are you more likely to dance your way down whatever path will get you wherever it is you're headed? The following paragraphs describe ways in which you approach the tasks life brings to you, and to what extent you are focused or flexible in how you choose to proceed.

Your approach toward your obligations is:
FOCUSED AND FLEXIBLE

Words that describe you:
• Casual
• Informal
• Compliant
• Reliable
• Organized
• Solid
• Dependable
• Uncommitted
• Genuine

A General Description of How You Interact with Others
When you take on a task at work or at home, you are reliable; you get the job done. In an organized way, you define the goal, lay out a plan, figure how long the task will take, and get to work "solid and dependable you".

But and this is important you're not a slave to the plan. You're committed to it, but not chained to it; the connection is more casual and informal. You know that sometimes "the best laid plans" fall off the tracks; when this happens, you clean up the train wreck and start over, undeterred.

Though not happening often, when plans change, you're okay with it. In fact, sometimes you change the plan. It's too nice of a Saturday to finish organizing the garage. Let's go for a bike ride instead. True, the next rainy Saturday will likely find you back in the garage, but for now the work can wait.

What an interesting combination of qualities in you're organized, but casual; solid, but compliant; and dependable, but informal. At home and at work, people know they can rely on you. You take great satisfaction in knowing that people think of you as disciplined and responsible, but you also know that you have something of a free spirit in you, and when this spirit moves you, off you go, following the impulse of the moment. You are rightly proud of your work ethic, but you also enjoy your willingness to lay the tools down, crank up the music and play like a child.

Negative Reactions Others May Have Toward You
Some people live like Marines: duty-bound, disciplined and driven. To these people you might seem uncommitted; where they would never leave work for play or change plans in the middle of their life's forced march, you let the circumstance sway you and move in a different direction, and they don't understand.

Others live like kites on a string, attached by thin threads to the solid ground of responsibility and are blown about by every gust of impulse or imagination. To these people you might seem too cowardly, like you'll flirt with your impulses but never give in fully, play on a Saturday but never blow of the entire work-week to "follow your bliss".

While these Marines and kite-flyers might look down on you for your combination of focus and flexibility, others might be envious. They can't free themselves from a sense that they're not doing enough, or from the equally frustrating feeling that they're not free enough.

And here you are with your accomplishments and your pleasures, getting the job done but also getting your hair blown back as you run with the wind. As far as these people are concerned, you're lucky you've got the best of both of the worlds in which they feel they fail.

Positive Responses Others May Have Toward You
What a great life you have, and a great attitude to boot. You know when to buckle down and push ahead to get the job done, and you do it well. You know when to lay the tools of your trade aside, grab your kite and head for the meadow where you can run with the wind. Many people will see and admire in you this lovely combination of a person who can focus, but who is flexible enough to know when to let the spirit move you in some new and livelier direction.

It's a life they aspire to, and they delight in seeing it played out in your life. They may ask your advice and turn you into a mentor of the full and balanced experience. They will want to know how you do it, what the costs are, and if you get frightened that you're not working hard enough or playing often enough. They may make you think about your own life more than you have, so you can share it with those who want to emulate this balance between flexibility and focus. They may be correct lucky you!


Introduction to Extraversion
Some days you want to hang out by yourself, not answer the phone, and make the world go away. The next day you e-mail everyone, schedule lunch with a friend, and try to find an evening gathering to take part in. It may be the phases of the moon, or something you ate; some days are just like that. In actuality, your desire to be with others or to be alone reflects something deep in your personality. Some of us are more comfortable by ourselves or with one or two friends, while others of us crave the crowd and can't stand it when the house is empty or the phone doesn't ring. The following paragraphs describe your fundamental desires about being with other people; whether you are generally an outgoing person or more reserved, if you seek adventures with others, if you tend toward assertiveness or kindness.

When it comes to Extraversion you are:
OUTGOING

Words that describe you:
• Friendly
• Gregarious
• Full of Life
• Unreserved
• Kindhearted
• Talkative
• Emotional
• Spontaneous
• Vigorous

A General Description of How You Interact with Others
People light you up. In conversations, planning meetings or almost any social situation, you bring your energy and your friendly, outgoing personality into these engagements with other people, and you come away pumped up. You can hardly wait for the next event, as long as other people will be there. And you're good at it.

You know how to communicate. You listen well, the first rule of good communication, and then, when it's your turn, you talk vigorously and with animation; in your uninhibited way you give all that you've got to the encounter.

In situations where you feel very safe, when you know and trust the people you're with, you can be very kindhearted and unrestrained. You let your affection for and pleasure in being with others flow freely. You're wide open And when you get back this same kind of unrestrained warmth, you are deeply satisfied. Because you are so friendly and full of life, these are among your favorite moments.

Negative Reactions Others May Have Toward You
As much as you like being with other people, not everyone will like being with you. Hard to believe, but your gregarious and warm manner is not everyone's cup of tea. Some people are more cautious than you in personal encounters; others think the work place should be more formal, more impersonal than is comfortable for you. Still others, who may want more of the spotlight, will find you too much to compete with once you get your lively and outgoing self in motion.

Here's another word of caution. You've been at this warm and open way of relating for a while, but for some people it's a brand new experience. They may be protecting something inside themselves, some fear or guilt or shame, or some private part of their story that they're not yet ready to share. Your openness might threaten them, and they'll take a step back and be reluctant the next time to engage you in the kind of exchange you find so easy and satisfying but they find so dangerous.

Positive Responses Others May Have Toward You
Many people, most probably, will be glad to be in the room you're in. At work you make the environment livelier and the banter more interesting, so the time moves swiftly and the experience is a happier one. At home you keep everyone connected because you engage each of them in the conversational action, and as a result they are more connected as well with one another. You make home a warmer and more interesting place for everyone who lives there.

You might also be helpful to some people. There are those who need to talk but aren't very good at it. They don't know how to begin the kind of conversation that would allow them to share whatever is in their personal stories that they'd like or need to talk about. You could make that easier for them with your way with words. Some people just need an example and a little encouragement to come out of their shell and get into the greater fun and personal connectedness that will make their lives so much more satisfying. Again, you might be just the right person to make that happen for them.

So almost everyone will be glad to be with you, you make life more interesting for those you live and work with, and you could help some of your friends who need just a little encouragement to open up and find in themselves the kinds of energetic and warm connections that you thrive on. Not that you are a pushover; in fact, you are often quite assertive. In taking care of yourself you also make sure that others are engaged and energized.